So, after... many months, MW is now employed.

A round of applause, please.

He will be living with 10 youth in the northern part of the province for 3 periods of 3 months, so 30 youth in all. He'll be the leader/hen mother of the house, which is pretty funny.

Honestly? I've got a lot of thoughts in my head right now. A lot. A part of me is jealous of MW for the experience he will have. Meanwhile, I will be here living the exact opposite life of him. I feel a sense of panic. Then again, this isn't the first time I've felt this way when one of us has moved away. You'd think I'd be used to it by now.

It's the unknown. I always get scared about what could happen, but somehow we always manage to get through it stronger than ever. I think maybe I just have to trust in us a bit more.

I'm so proud of MW, though, and I've admired the goals he has set for himself. And maybe that's where part of the panic comes from. It seems like 'getting a job' has been my biggest goal lately, and now it's time to push myself more. I've been selling myself short on a lot of things lately, and now seems like a good time to go ahead and accomplish some things. Important things. At least, important to me. I think I've been so used to living life so laid back, it might be harder.

You know, thinking about this a bit deeper. I never really discuss these issues with anyone. Goals, I mean. I feel like I'm personally offending people if I don't accomplish them. And I hate that feeling of letting anyone down. It's like when I tried to (finally) get my license in SH. I never talked about it to anyone, and I never posted anything here about it. I was embarrassed. I don't know why these things are so personal to me.

Uh. Right. I think I better stop here before Dr. Phil picks up my scent and I show up on "Intervention".